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Friday, May 27, 2011

Eviction Notice

Dear Doctor (a.k.a. Baby Boy Smith),

You are quickly getting to the point of being considered "late."  Now, while it is true that your parents do not have a perfect record of being on time, we try to be punctual around here, especially for Very Important Events.  Being born definitely falls under that category, wouldn't you agree?

If you don't make your big entrance by Thursday morning, your parents are going to have to go to the hospital for an 5:30 a.m.  And you should know that we DON'T do 5:30 a.m. around here.  Then, Mom will be injected with a yucky medicine that makes everything hurt more than it should.  The doctor will make you come out, whether you like it or not.  No fun for anyone, except maybe the anesthesiologist, who will make out like a bandit.  Is that what you want? 

It's tempting to fine you for being late, like an overdue library book, but we're pretty sure that you won't grasp the concept of money for a few more years, so it probably wouldn't be a valuable learning experience.  So we're going to go with good old-fashioned threats.  For EVERY day that you don't come out on your own, mom is going go out and buy you a completely ridiculous baby outfit.  Then, when you DO finally come out, she is going to take pictures of you in each of them, and post them on the internet.  Yes.  And don't think that Dad will save you from this fate, either.  He might try, but he won't be able to protect you forever, because, guess what?  He goes to work.

This could be you.

Also, we will look into buying THIS for you:

Consider yourself warned. 

Love, Mom and Dad

1 comment:

  1. You are so hilarious Rebecca! I do hope that he decides to make his entrance naturally, but just know that you'll get through it either way. I was induced with both Charlie and Brennan. Did it "naturally" with Charlie for about 12 hours, then caved and got the epidural. Got the epidural about 5 minutes after my first contraction with Brennan! No shame in that game. Good luck!!!