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Sunday, November 14, 2010

Getting a bit bumpy....

You had to know it was coming, and now it's here:  the post in which we look at pictures of me from the side and analyze my baby belly!   Aren't you excited??!!

I can actually still zip and button most of my pants, but a few weeks ago I noticed that my jeans were sort of falling down, which seemed really strange to me, because I knew I certainly wasn't losing weight (hello, mac and cheese)  Finally, I realized that my belly was pushing down the waist of my jeans and creating a really unfortunate bunching/sagging situation in the crotch area.  Which I'm pretty sure does NOT fall under the category of "Hot Fall Fashions"--pregnant or not.  So I stated wearing a Bella Band, which, for those of you who have not been pregnant recently, is a *magical* stretchy tube that holds up and smooths over your pants when they are unbuttoned:  
Dead sexy, right??
I've decided that the specialty maternity stores (Pea in the Pod, etc.), like wedding dress stores, are conspiring together to charge women outrageous sums of money for pieces of fabric, just because they can.  I have started stalking the cute maternity clothes at Target, but let's just pretend for Jeromy that there is absolutely no shopping going on, and that instead I am fashioning muumuus and giant pants out of trashbags and duct tape.  And, yes, that is how you spell "muumuu;" I looked it up. 

 So, back to the star of this post, my belly.  When people see me in regular clothes--jeans, sweaters, etc.--it's still not at all obvious that I'm carrying a little peach-sized Smith Fruit, especially with the Bella Band, which kind of sucks everything in.  If you saw me out and about, it would probably just look like I've been eating too much oh, I don't know....mac and cheese, perhaps.  In less restrictive pants, on the other hand, the bump is suddenly much more apparent:
Pregnant Lady Mugshot
So you could say that I enhanced things a bit, because in these pictures I'm wearing super loose pants and a really tight tank top.  But still....the belly is THERE, people!  We never took the pictures to prove it, but I did NOT look like this 3 months ago.  And I did NOT have to twist around in weird positions to buckle the ankle straps on my sandals.  

Oh, and in case you think I cheated by sticking my stomach out....oh, no no. HERE is what I look like when I REALLY pooch it out there:
RAAAWWWWWRRRRR!!!  BELLY MONSTER!!!!!
So, now I'm beginning to wonder just how big I'm going to look and feel 6 months from now.  The words "aircraft carrier" come to mind.....


***GEMS FROM JEROMY***
 On being asked by me, for about the 12th time, to feel my stomach and confirm that I do in fact have a baby belly going on:  "Ok, yes!!  It's out there.  You are no longer going to be running into things boobs-first."

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